so if i end up in UC's SLP masters program,

ryan & i will move in together.

big news.

i'm screaming i love you so but my thoughts you can't decode.

dude this summer is so lame!

my summer classes are kicking my ass

i'm flat broke and need 4gs for school by sept.

the fourth did rule!

i saw an AWESOME reds game.

i still miss my baby a.rosales.

set off too many fireworks

and hung out with a lot of sweet people.

next week:

harry potter premier!

copeland!

katie lake!

yah!

Drive onto Me.

hanging out with kids is amazing.

i can't wait until its my profession. 

having a degree and still doing nothing is not amazing.

hit the lights covered my absolute favorite Elliott song!

i'm just impressed someone in the world listens to Elliott

(other than my lover boy & me!)

right now I'm in love with:

+the hangover because I am a bro

+ my new, blue DSi

+animal crossing wild world! 

NEWS FLASH:

I AM NOT GETTING MARRIED ANYTIME SOON...

so please stop asking.

please come home.

i feel like fighting with everyone right now. i called my sister a bitch four times on the way home from the airport today and i already want to punch ryan in the throat and i haven't even seen him yet.

moving on, my two summer classes cost me 2gs! I found out this week that my leveling classes are offered 3 per quarter so I have to go from Summer-Spring without being a full time student (ie no health insurance) and since leveling courses aren't "degree seeking" I do not qualify for ANY finical aid. Cool party. 

On the GRE front, I bought two study books and just need to schedule a test to motivate me to crack their spines. 

Florida was nice, well... it was cheap and I got to chillax with my family. I took a three hour nap when I got home today. I napped almost everyday I was down there. The beach wears a girl out. I also got sun poisoning. That is not an exaggeration either. I hurled because of it and i still have this HUGE blister on my back... skin cancer is probably in my near future.

I need to find a big kid, or at the very least a bigger kid job soon. I'm starting to resent the squirrel. I have being a college grad working at a restaurant... yeah, I have a B.S. and work for 3.65 an hour. 

anyway, a short list of sweet things in my life:

+"extremely loud & incredibly close" by Jonathan Safran Foer

+true blood & weeds new season.

+the genius program on my ipod.

ugh my room will never be clean again. some one come take half of my wardrobe. 

i think i want an anchor tattoo when jesse starts up again.

how original. 

i'm so crafty these days.

if you want a feathered barrette, call me!

new moon.

life post graduation is sort of depressing. i haven't applied for any jobs since i start summer school in July, but I started looking in to volunteering at Children's, which would be awesome, I just have to jump through a lot of hoop in order to do so. I think it will be worth it, so I'm going to attempt it.

Last summer at this time I had two jobs and worked a TON, but this summer so far I've really just sat on my bed and downloaded music and played Vortex on my ipod. I need some sort of pressure to feel normal. I just feel so worthless with all this free time. 

I think it's about time I move out. I know it will break my dad's heart, but I really don't know how much longer I can keep up this facade that I'm some 17 year old. I want to decorate my own place and I want to hang out in my underpants without getting yelled at.

I'm getting weirdly antsy about getting married. My logical side keeps winning out. I'm too young. I'm too naive. and Ryan isn't ready. I just really want to live with him, but I'm nervous if I agree to move in with him there will be no motivation to get married. 

Ugh. I need to start going out... this is ridiculous.