never better.

"a lot of my friends shake when they don't drink... all of my friends wheeze in their sleep... all of my friends think green, but afford to live it, can't ignore the cynics, can't explore the gimmicks, can't report the dividends. limited only by the need to stay fed and given up is like latin, its dead. it don't happen don't even cross their head, trapped in our own web, but its our bed."

current obsession:

boxer  briefs for girls:

you are mine.

i'm WILL read watchmen before 3/06.

sometimes working 11 hour shifts is okay... today was not one of those days.

i'm ordering new specs, ones that actually fit my head.

rsm is the loml.

i miss my ipod terribly...

trust the sweat not the face it's on.

sorry in advance for how all over the place this post will be,

bare with me:

So I've been watching a crap-ton of movies and tv lately, I know how exciting, but some people did suggest some awesome and addicting jems:

Jake suggested I watch this documentary "Standard Operating Procedure", which was all about an American Military Prison in Iraq where a lot of inhumane and degrading "interrogation" methods were used.  This movie just re-affirmed my new understanding that all humans are inherently evil and that we must actively make conscious choices not to be complete monsters. It's disgusting how a lot of people are able to go on and turn a blind eye to one another. How could you treat someone like they were worthless and still sleep at night? I know they say "War is hell", but aren't we supposed to be some sort of nation that at least pretends to care about human rights? 

We had a pretty interesting conversation about this in my Death, Dying, Grief class regarding how "well-adjusted" nazi soldiers and suicide bombers usually behave... but what does it mean when you are well adjusted to a despicable society (which includes our own society)... I feel jaded sometimes, but I hope I never get to the point where I'm numb to wanting to help others.

Oddly enough, Seb suggested I check out this TV series, Jekyll, which is amazing and ties into this idea of being inherently evil... I haven't finished the first season yet, but it's my goal for this week. It seriously is an amazing show so far and is available on netflix watch instantly, so check it out.

Now on to my personal suggestion to those who need a break from all my negative nancy posts: Lonely Island's "Incredibad" came out this week and it's stellar. I might be a little biased do to my love for the Andy Samburg & little Jorma, but I pretty much laugh my ass off alone in my car everyday because of it and find some new ridiculous lyric every time I listen to it. Casey showed me and Ryan the video for "I'm on a Boat (feat. T-Pain)" (seriously!) on Sunday night and made me love that song even more. I'm sure I'm like the only person who enjoys it this much, but whatever.

other than that, life is oddly working it's self out. I decided to attempt to build bridges in contrast to my normal attempts at burning them, maybe even start construction on some that I've burnt in the past. 

k + j & l + r

it makes me so happy that every weekend lately is a giant lovely double date. :]

come now sleep.

If I make it to heaven I may be as bloody as hell.
Would you still take me?
I'm afraid that you might say, "depart from me, I never knew you."

I'm in the wrong body. I'm in the wrong body. I'm in the wrong body.
I must have stumbled in.

All the love I want to give gets caught between every rib.
What does that make me?
I have good intentions, but no exit for them to come out right through.

moar lawls.

death broz.

my moms turned 50 yesterday, she's still a milf. hahah. Seriously, I hope I got all my aging genes from her.

kev is back in school, well, cinci state. lawls.

erin almost died sunday night, apparently. her breathing situation is really weird... for this i am glad that ohio basically criminalized smoking.

some punk kid stole ryan's phone at his gym. it's lame. word to the wise: stealing verizon phones is pointless unless you just like to fuck someone's day up, in that case, mission accomplished.

i think i might join ryan's gym when PHE 108 is over... only i'm leaving my shit in my car.

i'm back into "heavier music"... weird.

i volunteered to be a counseling Guinea Pig and start next weds., I know the PERFECT subject to talk about with her. I need an outsiders opinion anyway...

I really need to do my taxes, so I can irresponsibly buy a new ipod & camera with my moola.

oh yeah and I got the best/cutest new ever today, but i can't very well post it here. 

what i learned this weekend:

1. conditioning always beats heart & raw talent.

2. maturity does not coincide with aging. so don't confuse the two.

3. the "self-fulfilling prophecy" is no joke.

4. somethings are out of my hands, but that doesn't make it any less painful to watch.